It’s Friday 2:10 am 1st May, 2020. I just finished scrolling through Twitter, I did some Instagram too and then Facebook. I read some inspiring stories. I saw the progress some people have made, some people also shared their failures.
I love to think about everything. I like to analyze issues. If someone asks me a question, I’ll want to know why they asked that particular question, why they chose to ask me and why they even need an answer. But I’ve found myself lost in extremely deep thoughts and analysis these past days.
There are two people in my mind’s courtroom right now, both trying to prove a point.
Here comes Counsel One
I’m here wondering how the future will look like. Whether I’ll win in this battle called life. Let me rephrase that, whether I’ll pick up the crown that awaits me at the end of this life.
Will my childhood dreams be fulfilled? Will I stay obedient to God’s leading to the end? Will the career plan I drafted in my journal come to life? How will I celebrate my next birthday? What great gifts are my offering your parents? What will my home be like? What are the great achievers doing right now? Will I sign up for a dancing class months before my wedding? When will this end so we can work and commission our library project? How will it feel like living as a newly wed in the first month? When I read Americanah, it inspired me to start blogging. What will the next book inspire me to do?
Over to Counsel Two
But years ago, I didn’t ever think I’ll be at this particular spot in life, using the skills I have this much, trying my best to walk in the path of victory despite numerous defeat. I had a totally different plan than what I’m walking in. Mmmm… Did I even have a plan? I think they were expectations. And some of those expectations were met. There are many fulfilling projects I’m engaging my skills in which I never expected. I’m walking on good paths I didn’t imagine. So why don’t I do my best and keep moving forward.
This journey will be beautiful. Believe!
It’s 2:40am…the debaters are murmuring now. I can’t hear what their saying. I’m off to bed.